I am the embodiment of imperfection.

Currently, my sink is filled with dishes because my dishwasher is filled with clean ones, and I am out of dishwashing soap pods. But I ordered some from Amazon today, not to worry. I used a gift card from Christmas because I have no cash and my debit card was compromised. I just ate a whole bag of alfredo on my own. I love the way it swirls around my fork and how white the milk is when it’s boiled. It gives me a sense of satisfaction to scrape it from the bottom of my stainless steel pan because I hate teflon.

I used a wooden spoon because I detest plastic, but I can’t seem to stay away from it completely- this is me cringing every time I have to throw something away.

I had someone ask my sister recently, “Who is Lisa when no one is looking…” *que one of my favorite songs 

That is a complicated question. But the best answer I could give you is imperfect.

All of my Christmas decorations are put up, except for my tree and my tree is only out because I do not have two trash bags big enough to fit the middle section and the bottom section in. It’s a lot like my body. Finding shirts seem to be easy, but finding bottoms can be like searching for a sober individual at your cousin Tom’s New Years party.

And just like this Christmas tree sometimes I loose my head. I lose everything.

My bed isn’t made. In fact lately I’ve preferred my couch. That seems typical of me during the holiday season. Sleeping by a lit tree is exciting and different. That statement should show you how much I get out.

All day long I’ve been sitting on my recliner typing away at my book or blogging. If I’m not writing, I am working. If I am not working, I am organizing something or cleaning something or loosing myself in a thriller , an episode of The Blacklist, or some crime documentary.

Sometimes I study. I get my Bible out or read a book and underline certain sentences that stand out to me that I want to note or reference. Reading without a pen and highlighter? Inconceivable!

And I am on the verge of loosing my mind due to no human interaction and being stuck in this house all day, but I am already in my PJs and I have to go outside to interact. So see! Even my emotions are imperfect.

If you looked into my house (you little creeper) those are probably all things you would see. I really am that boring.

And you know what… I do just fine reading, writing, cooking, organizing, cleaning or letting my bearded dragon Shasta out for awhile. Being alone for so long has taught me one thing- I like to hang out with myself. I used to be afraid to be alone with me, but not so much anymore.

At the end of the day, all of my imperfections- my dishes in the sink, my dirty clothes that keep piling up, my mixed emotions of wanting to be a hermit yet wanting human interaction, they all are one big huge mess that is me.

Instead of allowing our disheveled lives to put us in a bind why don’t we embrace our imperfections and learn to love ourselves not because we are great- but because we need us.

You needs you.

To keep going.

Imperfections and all-

You are loved.
You are valued.
You are useful.